Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize