That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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