did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
