you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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