i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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