Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
