I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize