I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
