I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize