hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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