I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize