He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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