Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
