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i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
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