Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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