Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Randomize