Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
