their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
