you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize