paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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