i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
