Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Randomize
