I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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