I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
