I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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