I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
The power of my boobs compel you
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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