I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize