This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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