You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
i now understand why vodka
Randomize
