Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
