Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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