the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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