fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
