She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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