Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
