You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
