im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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