I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize