Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
