you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
