weddingsv make me drug and hornr
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
So many bounce houses so little time
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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