Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
