we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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