I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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