Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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