he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
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