I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
