I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
