I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize
