ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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