ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
